Damaged by divorce: Restored by grace


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Christian marriages are not immune from divorce. It happens much too often. Marriage is an institution established and ordained by God. The marriage union between man and woman mirrors the relationship between Christ and His bride, which is the Church. (Ephesians 5)

My husband and I have both been through divorce in the past, but by the grace of God we were forgiven for the mistakes we made in past relationships. God brought us together and He has have given us an opportunity to serve Him as missionaries. We also try to use our past experiences to minister to others with similar experiences.

Read more about this in the article, “Damaged by Divorce & Restored by Grace“. I wrote this article for startmarriageright.com.

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Let Go


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I can relate to the words of Lindsay McCaul’s song, Let Go. So many times in my life, I held on to things far too long… things that weighed me down… things that made life more difficult. Why is it that we find it hard to let go and allow God to carry the things in life that are too much for us to handle? Nothing is too big, too heavy, or too hard for God, so why do we hurt ourselves when He stands there waiting for us to let go?

My husband is a big, strong guy and he can lift and carry a lot more weight than I can, so when there is heavy lifting to do, he handles that for me. I have some problems with my back and neck that actually makes it even more difficult for me to lift or carry anything of substantial weight. However at times I will lift heavy items on my own instead of depending on my husband and when I do this I usually end up with back pain. My husband reminds me that He would have taken care of the lifting if only I would just allow him. He is strong enough to do the lifting and to carry the heavy stuff with little effort, so He wonders why I don’t just let things go and let him take care of it.

In the same way that my husband is willing to make things easier for me and to help me avoid pain by carrying the load, God stands waiting and willing to carry our burdens, if we will only, let go. My husband can take care of the physically heavy stuff for me, if I let go and hand it over to him. God can take care of all the heavy stuff that others may not even be aware of. There are things in life that we hold on to and attempt to carry that can hurt us much deeper than just causing physical pain.

For many years, I had things in my life that was weighing me down. I was a single mom with a low paying job. I worried about finances and how I was going to pay the bills. I worried about my children because I knew that they were affected by every poor choice I had made. I was lonely, so I tried to fill the void with unhealthy and ungodly relationships. I was angry at people in my past that had hurt my children and me. I was angry at myself for allowing my life to get so out of control. I was ashamed of the person that I saw in the mirror. I was disappointed that life had not turned out as I had planned. I reached a point that I was physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted and I felt that I could not take another step. I could no longer handle the weight of the load I was carrying.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”   Phil.4:6-7

I knew the Lord during this time of my life. I was a child of God, but for some reason I refused to let go of the worry, the anger, the guilt, the disappointment, and the shame. Instead of letting go, I stumbled through life with this heavy load and I endured the pain. When I finally fell on my face in exhaustion, I cried out to God and asked Him to please take the burden off me. I remember the feeling of peace that I felt the moment I finally let go and gave it all to Him. Since that day in 2002, life has been so much easier. Life is not worry-free, nor is it pain-free, but life is easier because I’m not weighed down by things of the past or by things that I have no control over. I have peace because I know that God now carries all my concerns about my children, my finances, and my future. Since I let go, God has taken away the anger, the guilt, and the shame of my past. I no longer feel lonely because I walk with God and He assures me that He will never leave me alone.

Are you holding on to something that you need to allow God to carry for you? Let go and give it to Him. God can carry any load that you have. He carries mine and He can handle yours also. You can trust God to take care of your loved ones. He loves them more than you ever can. You can trust God with your worries about the future because He holds tomorrow. Let go and give him your worries, your grief, your pain, your bitterness, your anger, your unforgiveness, your guilt and shame.

“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”  1 Peter 5:7

God desires to carry our burdens but we must first let go. He will not pry open our hands and take things from us, but He does gently cradle our hands and assure us that everything is ok and that we can let go and place things in His hands. God wants us to trust Him with all we have… no matter how large or how small. It’s time to LET GO.

 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”  Matthew 11:28-30